Why does this site make no sense to me?

Because the captions are unrelated to the images.

Why do I keep trying to figure out how the captions relate?

I’m not entirely sure. But everyone else does it too. People seem to have a need to make sense of the world, and this website completely disrupts that.

Have you ever pet a baby hippopotamus?

No. That would be dangerous.

Where can I caption images?

Either use image editing software, or try ROFLBOT.

I hate this website. Why does it exist?

I’m sorry. Perhaps this will make you feel better:

Who created this website?

The same guy who made mylifeisaverage.com and averagecats.com.
You can contact me, and I’ll try to respond as soon as I can.